Dear Godfather of Zimbabwe Football,

Greetings from the proverbial land of milk, honey and dust or Guruve.

Well, although I have known you for a very long time, this villager has not written to you personally and I am sure you are wondering what provoked the village wordsmith. Certainly, an owl does not fly during the day for nothing, when you see it flapping its wings, you must know something is after its life.

It is football matters my brother! Nothing less nothing more. Before you went into football administration where you have earned yourself the sobriquet, The Godfather of Football, you were a highly respected businessman and known for your astuteness, business acumen, vision and the cleverness of a hare. But as village elders with cotton tuft hair say, although a hare is known for its proclivity for tricks, it has never mastered the art of climbing up a tree.  I am sure you have discovered the difference between running your business empire and running national football. You are stuck in a web, too difficult to untangle!

Karitundundu, the ageless village autochthon of wisdom and knowledge was very excited when you took over the reins at Zifa Village, itself a village built to run the affairs of our boys and girls, who have mastered the art of knocking around that air-filled cattle hide.

But after your short stint, Karitundundu, now doubts if you have ever kicked even a stationary ball given the direction you are stirring this country’s football.

The oracle was angered by the way you handled women’s football at a time when the nation was celebrating 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence.  Even with a coach from Mars and the talent of anointed angels, the Mighty Worriers would never win given that they went into camp just a week before the African Women Football Safari. Where Phillip? Honestly where have you seen a team win when it does not train? Why waste money to let the girls go and be punch bags? What is the motive Phillip? Should we participate for the sake of participating? Cry our beloved football!

Remember, Philip, our tears have not yet dried from the Rio escapade, yet we suffer another humiliation? While we were still licking wounds from that humiliation, you sought to brazenly tell us on radio that you had a grand plan and sponsorship for all the preparations. That was a brazen lie.

This villager listened on the radio, seated on a rock promontory near Dande River in utter disgust and disbelief as you ranted on and on, raising the libido of football and when the time came you failed us. The villager in me is being polite, Phillip, the truth is you lied to the nation. It was 17 days before the African women’s Football extravaganza started and day after day of cloudless skies passed, hopping to see the girls in camp or playing friendlies. Nothing happened. Nothing, nothing, nothing!  Nothing Phillip.

I remember radio sports personalities Ephraim Tagu, Yvonne Mangunda and Steve Vickers politely questioning your assertions in subsequent commentaries. Well this is pathetic, Godfather.

Then there is the Premier Soccer League relegation fiasco. What administration is this Phillip? Rules cannot be changed like the way you change your executive suits to suit an occasion. Teams must know the rules before the season starts and changing rules at the dying moments of the season is tantamount to rigging. It is a fallacy. It causes chaos and confusion.

I know you love flamboyancy and changing your suits and cars to suit occasions and that makes you a big social and economic brand. Granted! But you cannot do the same in football administration. This is football Phillip, rules must never be applied selectively.

The hodgepodge of suspensions in the PSL leadership, the rantings and all that, means things have fallen apart and you as the centre can no longer hold. Everything is becoming political and tribal. It is never good for football and for Zimbabwe.

Again what does it benefit you Phillip, to start litigation against Cuthbert Dube and his executive? That will weigh you down and you will lose focus. You are already captain of a rocking boat, you could sink. Look at what Henrietta Ruswaya, Nation Dube and Edzai Kasinauyo’s case, they left a rotten egg splashed on your handsome face. Again, it defies logic and even common sense that you think court judgments have no effect on football. Granted common sense is no longer common, but why can’t you let bygones be bygones? What will the Cashbert, sorry, Cuthbert Dube executive litigation give you? Does litigation not take you the same courts whose recent judgment you denigrate? Come on Phillip, why would you expect honey from a fly?

The majority of Zimbabweans want to enjoy football. You might want to know that over the years Zimbabwean fans have deserted the PSL and gone with the English Premier Soccer League and your continued squabbling locally will chase away the little fans that remain.  Stadia are getting empty and emptier with every match.

In my village opinion, your duty is to manage domestic football and take it to greater heights in order to retain the trust of the supporters, the players and teams, but you seem to have taken the path to stir football into an abyss, into a deep chasm. It might never recover.

The whole football scenario has become an unfolding circus in which you, Phillip, risks becoming the chief clown.

Glory be to the ancestors!


Yours sincerely

Isdore Guvamombe

The Villager.